A Gift

I watched a video today
from a young woman
who has cancer
and is dying.

She said she wasn't afraid of death necessarily,
she was afraid of missing out on life.

She wanted to see her kids grow up,
She wanted to see her grandkids,
She wanted to grow old with her husband.

I cried for her sorrow...
I cried for my shame...
for what she considered a gift,
I look at as a curse.

Growing old, that is.
I hate it!
I hate not being able to do
the things I used to...
I hate how people treat you
when you start getting old,
like you no longer know what
you're talking about cause you're old.

Yet she wanted to grow old.

I realize what a gift I've been given.
To see life through til the end...

To see my kids through their milestones.
graduation, marriage, children...
To see my grandchildren's face light up
when they see me...
To see them run to me
with their little chubby legs
and arms outstretched.

A gift that I have been ungrateful for.

Oh, I love the grandchildren thing,
just not the growing old thing.
But you can't have one without the other.

See, that's the gift...
to know that when God takes one thing away
He puts something else more wonderful in its place.

He may be taking away my youth...
But he's giving me something in return.
To see physical life fulfilled.
Something some will never get
the opportunity to see.

Dare I be ungrateful
for such a precious gift?

And on that day when He calls me home...
He'll again replace that which He has taken away,
with something more wonderful.
Real life...eternal life...
Thank you, Jesus
for this wonderful gift.

"O that men would praise the Lord for his goodness, and for his wonderful works to the children of men!"
Ps. 107:8